Goldman Sachs Executive Praises Boldness of Transocean Safety Bonuses
Transocean is being widely praised by business leaders for giving their executives “safety” bonuses in the face of widespread criticism over the explosion of the Deepwater Horizon, the death of several workers and the total annihilation of the Gulf of Mexico.
“It’s important for business leaders to stand up for one another,” said an unnamed executive from Goldman Sachs. “Those Transocean guys stood tall for us when we were getting our bonuses for destroying the world economy. People who are hating on them need to think how much damage this company would do if we didn’t pay their leaders appropriately. You want the whole Atlantic Ocean to look like the floor at Mr. Lube?”
“Look, I think everyone at that company has suffered a great deal in the last year. Even the workers. It’s time for the healing to begin. American business has to be forward looking. Unless you want all those rigs in the Gulf to go Deepwater Horizon, you best let those boys have their money and carry on about your business.”