GE Pays Zero Tax: Threatens to Leave America if Taxes Remain This High

American corporate icon, GE, will pull out what’s left of its American operation if the current administration doesn’t move to lower corporate taxes. The company is advocating a new Less Than Zero tax policy.

“America has the highest corporate tax rate in the world,” said GE spokesperson, Art Fuldodger “American businesses cannot compete under these conditions. Last year GE booked profits of more than 14 billion dollars. In previous years, using traditional mathematics, GE would have paid over 3 billion in taxes. That is an astonishing figure. Now, to the lay person, they see that on the surface we are paying zero taxes, and yes we’re even getting a refund, but there are many hidden taxes that your average Joe the Plumber doesn’t see. People just understand how much it costs to make 35% of 14 billion equal zero. For instance, we have nearly 1000 tax lawyers who we have paid enormous sums of money to re-invent mathematics and erase national boundaries. Consider that expense a tax. We also pay untold millions of dollars a year for an army of lobbyists to keep all of the loopholes in the tax code that we spent years and untold millions of dollars lobbying for after that crypto-communist, Ronald Reagan, tried to close them down. Consider our lobbyist payroll a tax. Call the two hidden taxes I have mentioned, the Lawyer and Lobbyist Tax. It is a tax that could easily be removed if we simply remove corporate tax altogether. No one likes lawyers. Especially tax lawyers. No one likes lobbyists. And no one likes taxes. It is frankly impossible to imagine how we can pay down the federal deficit unless the government gives us more money to do business here. Let’s take kinetic military action on the tax code now. Call in a an airstrike or a tomahawk missile and save innocent American small business civilians from the Muammar Khadafi madman dictator redistributionist tax code. Less than zero, less than zero, less than zero!”

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~ by mcgrenerex on March 25, 2011.

One Response to “GE Pays Zero Tax: Threatens to Leave America if Taxes Remain This High”

  1. I agree with GE, American CORPORATE Taxes ARE too high. They should be zero, let me explain.
    All income from Corporations that go to shareholders as dividends or Executives and other employees as Salaries are ALREADY taxed at some of the highest rates in the world.
    Any Corporate income that DOESN’T go to expenses, shareholders or employees usually gets reinvested in the company. For a company like say Mobil (who bought Exxon), it usually means an investment in more oil drilling, which creates jobs and lowers the price of oil. At a company like Ford, it means an investment in more factories, which means more jobs in both construction, manufacturing and all it’s related industries.
    Critics point out that a lot of corporate income is going offshore to other countries, and while that’s true, it’s primarily to avoid the highest Corporate Tax Rate in the world, here in the U.S. Hence if the Corporate Tax was eliminated, this movement offshore would not only come to a grinding halt, but in addition you would see Multinational companies like Toyota, Seimans, LG and many others relocate their headquarters here to the U.S. All the worlds major manufacturers would source their parts from the U.S. in order to be able to claim that the majority of their income came from the U.S. How many MILLIONS of jobs would this create? While it’s true that all the companies moving here would end up paying zero in INCOME Taxes, the buildings they occupy, the electricity they use, the payroll they hand out, all would be taxed at the Federal, State and Local, thereby creating Billions in additional tax revenue.
    In one fell swoop we would solve the fiscal crisis plaguing Local State and Federal governments, along with the unemployment issues.
    Even the Tax Lawyers and Accountants would be happy, since their job would shift to keeping the majority of the income these companies get firmly footed here in the U.S. to avoid taxes in other countries.
    Of course the only ones who would be unhappy are the Politicians and Lobbyists, since the Corporations would no longer have to contribute to neither to keep their tax rates low and loopholes high.

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